Being the proud owner of a brand-new blog, I've noticed that I am developing a tendency to narrate everything. Really. Almost everything I do now is accompanied by a voice in my head trying to figure out how to phrase such-and-such an experience, just in case I want to write about it later.
Hence this post on one of the most mundane of all mundane activities - going to the grocery store.
I noticed today while at my local (Wal-Mart Neighborhood) market that grocery shopping seems to bring out my somewhat obsessive traits and behaviors. Normal people throw a list together, go to the store, buy groceries, and leave.
Not I.
No thrown-together lists for me, no sirree. My list is alphabetized. And not just alphabetized - it's alphabetized based on the section of the store where the items on said list are found. For example, at the Market, lunchmeat, fruit, cheese, and salad are all in the same section. So, the list reads: bananas, salad, sharp cheddar, turkey. Frozen peas, tilapia, shrimp, ice cream - all in the freezer section, hence: frozen peas, ice cream, tilapia, shrimp.
That could be considered almost normal, until I realized that I mentally debate my choices... with myself...in conversation form:
"Do I really want those bananas?"
"Yes. You like green bananas."
"But am I going to be able to eat 5 bananas before they get too yellow?"
"Well, probably not. But you could just get three and be fine."
"But I always feel bad separating the bananas. They grew up together. They traveled long distances over land and sea to get to this very market."
"Just buy 3 bananas."
"OK...I'm so sorry, bananas!"
Roughly the same thing happens in the cereal aisle, but it's usually a debate concerning fiber, sugar content, and whether I am realistically going to eat something with the texture of cardboard and/or small chunks of gravel. (Yes, GrapeNuts, I am talking about you.)
I carry the obsessive behavior into the checkout lane, where I. Must. Self. Check. Why, you ask? Because I bag my groceries much the same way I buy them - juice and milk go together, because they sit on the same shelf in the refrigerator. Ice cream and frozen peas get the same bag, because they're going to the same place also and I want them to have time to get to know each other before they're forced to huddle together in the arctic environment otherwise known as the freezer.
I am, truly, somewhat strange.
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4 comments:
Erin, this is terrifying. But I really want to go grocery shopping with you, as some sort of sociological/anthropological experience.
I think that I attack shopping as some sort of strategist, planning which section of the store to attack first during my drive over, quickly weaving in and out of aisles scouting shelves for things I may need, always trying to conserve steps, time, energy.
And I like self-check too. But because I'm always in a hurry, not because I'm obsessive. ;)
Yay for your new blog! I think I'll be a regular here.
wow. aside from the desire to self-check out (if I don't have too many items to) I'm completely backwards from you guys! I go sometimes with a rough list, but I only look at it twice. When i first get to the store I'll run down the list. Then, I wander. It's almost like a meditation. I abandon all order and surrender my will to that which is the nature of the grocery store: to provide sustinance/household conveniences. Whatever isle i'm in I look at what is there and get what i need. I'll remember the next thing I need and head in the general direction of where i think it is (because all grocery stores are different). This continues for quite sometime, but i often shop at night so there is little other traffic, and therefore virtually zero stress arond the whole thing. i usualy give myself at least 30 minutes for grocery shopping. each time i remember something new, i'll go to that section of the store, looking along the way for anything else on my list or that catches my eye. when i feel like i'm done, i pull my list out of my pocket for a second time and check to be sure i have everything. I'm super proud when i don't forget an item.
As far as internal conversations, I mentally breakdown most of my purchases by price/efficiency. "how much will this cost per meal, once i divide it up? Is it more cost effective to slice these myself, or should i just save time & energy by paying the extra 25 cents?" and my favorite is probably deciding how much i can make with any one given item, "Gee, the apples I'm getting for this tuna salad will also come in handy for cobbler, and to snack with the cashew butter i just bought for the cookies that use the walnuts that are also in the cobbler and tuna salad. Score!"
so, yeah. that's me.
I also think it's worth noting that the shopping lists I concoct for goodwill expeditions are epic.
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